in the changing of seasons: a final post

 June 26, 2008. 

The day I wrote my first post on this blog. I was sitting in a hotel room in New York, prepping to fly to London. As the flight took off the next day, I thought, "That's it. It's over. I've ruined my whole life and I'm going to die somewhere in Africa, alone and abandoned." (I've always leaned towards the dramatic.) 

And the truth is, I did ruin my whole life. For weeks, I had been taking most of my stuff to the local Goodwill. I made so many trips that at one point, the intake guy commented, "Are you getting a divorce? You're here everyday with tons of stuff." 

"Nope. Just selling my house, giving away everything that won't fit in two suitcases, leaving my dog behind and moving to a different country. You know, totally normal."

I ruined my "house in the suburbs, little red sports car, single woman with a dog" life. 

I ruined my "culturally-specific, privileged majority, America is the Best" life.

I even ruined my "western interpretation, American Bible" life.

But the reality is, God told me to get on that airplane. I was scared, nervous, afraid... and fully convinced that God had told me to do it and He was going to figure it out. I was totally naive about what I needed to survive in another country. I didn't know that I packed the wrong books and the wrong shoes. I didn't realize that I would need a sweatshirt for the beach at night and a manual-charging flashlight for the rolling power outages. I showed up with the wrong things and the wrong ideas about what life in Tanzania would be like. But God was faithful. He helped me make friends and learn the Swahili words for green pepper and pineapple and figure out how to make coffee over a gas burner. He helped me listen and learn, realizing that He does, indeed, speak every language and that pieces of His Spirit can be found in every culture all over the world. 

God did, indeed, ruin my life.  

And I am forever grateful for it. 

14 years later, I am about to get on another airplane. 

This Saturday, Hubby and I are headed to Tirana, Albania for a vision trip. We get to meet with the team living there, explore some historical parts of the country, figure out if we can feed our food-allergy family with the groceries available, and tour the school where our children could attend. If all goes well... I guess even if it doesn't go particularly well... if the team thinks God is in this and if we think God is in this, then we will start making many trips to our local thrift store, getting rid of anything that won't fit in two suitcases per person. 

(But this time, we don't have any pets to leave behind... much to the relief of my parents. wink. )

Our family has all the big feelings right now. Our oldest keeps having stomach aches, "I'm just so nervous" he keeps saying. So we made sure our Google Homes were set up so he can video call us or leave us messages anytime he wants. Our youngest says she is "big, giant sad" because she will miss us and also "a little nervous... and also maybe a little scared of the dark." Middle assured us, three times during our hour long family meeting, that he won't miss us because of all the fun things he will get to do and all the fun people he is looking forward to hanging out with... "Did you hear that Mom? I'm not going to miss you. Did you write it down on the prayer list? Well don't... because I'm not... going to miss you." (If you see him, please ask if he needs an extra hug. He is apparently (not) going to miss us an awful lot.) ;) 

And I have been a wreck. 

It's SO MUCH easier to follow God onto an airplane and let Him ruin your life when it's just your life He's ruining. When you are asking your husband and children to do the same, it's a whole different level of life ruination. 

And I pray that they will, one day, also be forever grateful for it. 

Since I started this blog to chronicle all the ways God ruined MY life when He called me to be a cross-cultural witness in Tanzania, and, as a family, we are embarking on a journey to let God ruin OUR lives, I think it's time for a change. This will be the final post on "in Times of Spring." Thank you for following along on this wild ride of change and unexpected miracles. It started as a way to tell the story of a single girl following a faithful God. And it's ending, full of faithfulness, heart break, miracles and unexpected joys. We pray our new stories will be just as full. 

If you'd like to follow along, we will continue blogging our story here at theschlattfamily.blogspot.com.